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May 14th, 2017

Sick to my stomach. Oh yes, and happy Mother’s Day, blah blah blah

Forgive me for bursting the happy Mother’s Day love fest bubble with something as brutal as rape, but I am sick to my stomach this Sunday morning.

Scarcely a week after the Indian Supreme Court sentenced 4 men to death for raping and eviscerating Jyoti Singh Pandey, the horror happens all over again.

This is distressing.

It is beyond disgusting.

It is truly, truly appalling.

But you must read it.

This is what happened last week, people.

We need to be outraged.

I can do nothing more than rant and rave here, but one thing I will rant about, is the use of “Nirbhaya” as a one-suits-all-name for yet another victim of crimes so foul they make you want to vomit.


Call Jyoti by her name.  Call this poor, poor 22 year old by her name.

They are not “symbols” of anything other than the degradation that some men will stoop to.

I don’t give a shit whether these dead women who were gang-raped, tortured, eviscerated, beaten up, run over were fearless (which is what Nirbhaya means).

Apparently Jyoti fought back against her rapists, which led one scumbag to claim that made things worse:

According to Singh, Nirbhaya had received the fatal degree of violence because she and her friend had tried to fight back. Here’s what he said: 

“When being raped, she shouldn’t fight back. She should just be silent and allow the rape. Then they’d have dropped her off after ‘doing her’, and only hit the boy.”

“You can’t clap with one hand – it takes two hands.”

“A decent girl won’t roam around at 9 o’clock at night. A girl is far more responsible for rape than a boy. Boy and girl are not equal. Housework and housekeeping is for girls, not roaming in discos and bars at night doing wrong things, wearing wrong clothes. About 20 per cent of girls are good.”

In the end – and PLEASE don’t misunderstand me here – in the end, I really don’t care whether these dead young women were brave or petrified as they were gang-raped and murdered.

They have names.

Use them.

Don’t call them Nirbhaya.

They were happy, loved young women whose lives were stolen from them, snuffed out in orgies of cruelty and terror and pain that hardly bear contemplation.

USE THEIR NAMES, damn it.  These women deserve to be remembered in death, not “symbolised”.

I think it is nothing more than lazy, sloppy, disrespectful reporting.  Personalise these dead women, so we can remember them as individuals, not part of a category of “fearless” nameless women.

No apologies for my rant this morning.

None whatsoever.

I am sickened, appalled, and terrified all at the same time.

I will close with a link to a blog post my daughter wrote less than 2 weeks ago, and which certainly struck a chord with many of my India-based female friends.  It is about the way men behave in Delhi.  Not all men, of course.  Of course not.

But it is symptomatic of so much that needs to change in this society.  And the fact that so many women could relate to this post – just see all the comments – is chilling.

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3 comments to Sick to my stomach. Oh yes, and happy Mother’s Day, blah blah blah

  • Sad to hear.God help and save us all to witness these brutalies …..Mercy Babaji.

  • Claude Bahout

    Sad is not the appropriate word!!! All these stories are awful, disgusting, appalling, these men should not be called human beings.

  • christine

    It is truly horrific, Claude. And even more frightening is the lack of public outrage…

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