Lies, damned lies and statistics

Lies, damned lies and statistics

In my last blog post, I told you how I’d managed to register the 6 eligible people in our household for their vaccinations on the government portal.

The site worked perfectly fine, accepting their registration, so ether are no complaints on that score.

But we were unable to book appointments for vaccines which were, we’d earlier been told, starting from 1 May for all adults.

1 May is tomorrow, I remind you.

No appointments.

There are no vaccines available in Delhi for this new age group.

Ne’er a one.

And the situation is similar in other parts of the country.

 Photo by Danish Siddiqui/Reuters

So what did our esteemed Health Minister do?

Did he express concern about the lack of vaccine roll out for the over 18s as promised?

Did he ****.

This is what the esteemed Minister tweeted, and I quote:

He actually shared the number of hits.

And the number of sms delivered.

This is sterling stuff, Mr. Health Minister, and I applaud your back-room boffins who handled this online registration.

Twitter, of course, went berserk.

Actually, I’m sure there were many thousands of Modi supporters lapping up the success of the “world-class” platform.

And all those API hits, of course.

But I don’t follow people like that on Twitter. (Doesn’t stop me getting trolled, though, but hey! all those “Proud Indian” types have to keep venting.)

Yes, so as I was saying, many people on Twitter were – how can I put this politely – underwhelmed by the stats of how many sms had gone out.

People want vaccines, not statistics.

Here, take a look at a few reactions:

I’d really hate to rain on the esteemed Minister’s parade, but since connectivity in my house is absolute rubbish, I must have generated at least 7 of those sms, for only 3 sets of registrations, but what the heck! It’s still a great feat, Mr. Minister – so many sms and so many API hits.

Woo hoo!

I’ll curse myself for this later, when I have to log back onto this “world-class” website – this time to register the night security guard’s wife. As one does.

Pramod told me, very seriously, before going off duty this morning, that I “had to” register her.

So I shall.


Whenever lockdown is lifted – if ever it is lifted – I’ll have to register my mother-in-law’s driver’s wife. As one does.

Just waiting for old Bola Ram the gardener to tell me his wife needs registering, too…

The more the merrier, as it were. (You know what I mean….I’m not being flippant, believe me I’m not. That’s the last thing on my sad, exhausted, worried mind.)

Photo by  Danish Siddiqui/Reuters


  1. Kiran Tandon

    Yes, it’s happening here too! But, managed to get one young man on it, and he has done a bunch! Including wives of some, in-laws …. just glad that one can help.

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