Just as one swallow does not a summer make, so one horribly insensitive Gujarati community does not a nation make.
But nonetheless, I am sharing with you this horrifically bizarre story of a wedding that took 2 days ago in Bhavnagar, in Gujarat – whilst simultaneously hoping that the trolls who regularly tell me to “go back home” stay quiet this time.
Indian trolls take offence at every damn thing, however repugnant, especially if the criticism comes from a foreigner such as myself…but I’ll take the risk.
Here’s a brief outline of this disturbing story.
Bride dies during her wedding ceremony.
Her body is kept in cold storage, while her sister is married instead to the same groom.
Please note I did NOT use that terrible term “married off”, which always disturbs me, implying the girl is little more than an object, though in this case…
A bride in Bhavnagar died of a heart attack in the middle of her wedding rituals at the marriage venue in the Subhashnagar area of Gujarat.
While performing her wedding rituals, the woman reportedly felt dizzy and fainted, reports News 18.
She was rushed to a hospital nearby, where the doctors said she died of a heart attack.
The family then decided to marry her sister to the groom and continued the wedding rituals with her younger sister. The bride’s body was reportedly kept in cold storage until the ceremony was over.
Even as the family mourned the death of Hetal, relatives proposed an alternative plan to ensure the wedding celebrations continued. They suggested the bride’s younger sister take her place and marry Vishal.
And this, below!! Just read it and try and stay calm…
Terming the incident ‘very sad’, corporator of Bhavnagar city and leader of Maldhari Samaj, Laxmanbhai Rathore asserted that the members of society convinced the family to set an example and not send the bridegroom empty-handed, even though the family of the bride was devastated by the death of their daughter.
You really don’t need me to enumerate the horrific implications here. But I shall do so, all the same:
- The bridegroom’s happiness is clearly paramount. One presumes that means he needs someone to have sex with, and must be satisfied, and it doesn’t really matter whether it is sister A (sadly dead) or sister B.
- The younger sister has no choice.
- The groom could have said no. But he didn’t. So clearly the identity of the bride was immaterial. He needed a woman, and one sister or the other, who cares?
- The power that “members of society” wield. Who the hell were these people to tell a bereaved family what to do?
- The notion that setting an example consists of trading one young woman for another. And, never forget, not sending the groom away empty-handed.
- The weakness of the bereaved family.
I find this story revolting on so many levels, especially the overwhelming need to have a wedding, death notwithstanding.
The reduction of women to objects here is just awful.
The pandering to the man.
But, as I said at the outset, this is – one sincerely hopes – an aberration.
Thank you for this incredible story. For a while, I thought women were making progress. Now, with the anti-abortion laws in the U.S. and stories like this in India, along with book burnings and government officials who crow about their conquests, I realize how silly that was.
It is beyond disheartening. I cannot believe the continued atrocities that women are subject to.
Same to same no! We have lots of Safaris in Gujarat too.
Hey. Nice daughter. You got another?
I know the below doesn’t address directly, the issues you raise. Your blog piece though is about events that are symptomatic of a Country in distress.
It’s so nice to see how far a 7,000 year old society has advanced. Is India turning itself into a Theocracy ruled by Leaders who can’t be factually questioned about their “alleged” improprieties and a religion whose activists think is superior to all others? And, therefore, violence, when it’s given the Hindu ok, is just fine.
Wow, it’s really come far in 7,000 years!
Sanjeev Jagtiani there are so many issues right now, as I’m sure you are aware. India is in a state of churn. But the continued misogyny is worrisome.